Lacking my own wisdom, I found myself sitting at my desk one morning last week thinking thoughts of self-loathing. I hated my look, my hair...my outfit. I look fat, old and tired, I thought to myself. I am relatively certain that I actually looked pretty close to the same way I did just four days earlier, when I felt adorable...yet I couldn't help myself from telling me that everything had taken a nose-dive while I slept overnight.
We compare ourselves to our others, and we compare ourselves to a "better" version of ourselves. Perhaps a version that is younger, thinner, more successful, or just generally happier. Each comparison leaves us more convinced that we are somehow less than we really are.
I find from time to time that I do the same thing with my knitting. I over-scrutinize the details of my seaming, or lay aside a garment less than thrilled with the fit or color, only to pick up up again sometime much later and wonder what I found displeasing in my work. Searching the pattern of a fine lace trim, I'm completely unable to find what I once thought was unmistakeable error.
Two days later, wouldn't you know, I felt completely like myself again. Who knows what clouded my self-perception...it may have been a dream, some random interaction, or a hormone imbalance. Yet when I look upon the work my maker has done in me, I am perfectly comfortable with who I am.